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CM Punk ink
January 3, 2013
After spending years getting an assortment of symbols inked into every available patch of his skin, champion wrestler CM Punk…
AJ Lee nude
January 1, 2013
Professional wrestler and psychotic nymphomaniac AJ Lee made a New Year’s resolution to be more sexually promiscuous and maniacal during…
Cena you can't wrestle
December 31, 2012
WWE superstar John Cena is undeterred by the taunts of fans around the world because he mistakenly believes they are…
Triple H Chaperone
December 30, 2012
Professional wrestler and behind-the-scenes WWE executive Hunter Hearst Helmsley has threatened to film a sequel to The Chaperone if he…
WWE Tout
December 29, 2012
Professional wrestling commentator Michael Cole was terminated by WWE this week and replaced by a robot that can spew inane…
WWE Raw
December 28, 2012
Monday Night Raw, the flagship weekly program of World Wrestling Entertainment, will increase in duration to nine hours starting in…
Mick Foley Roof
December 25, 2012
Using a hydraulic crane and the so-called “jaws of life,” the Long Island Fire Department dislodged retired professional wrestler Mick…
December 19, 2012
A pair of nefarious wrestlers hatching an evil scheme backstage at WWE Raw apparently somehow didn’t notice the camera crew…
wwe tables ladders chairs
December 12, 2012
Local wrestling fan Robert Mitchell has successfully tricked his wife into ordering this Sunday’s WWE pay-per-view thanks to its ambiguous…
steel chair
December 11, 2012
In stark contrast to tradition, a professional wrestler recently grabbed a steel chair and, instead of clobbering his opponent with…
I'm a paul heyman guy
December 9, 2012
Longtime professional wrestling personality and evil mastermind Paul Heyman surprised his colleagues and acquaintances yesterday when he admitted, via Twitter,…
Big Show size
December 7, 2012
Professional wrestler Paul “Big Show” Wight has developed a fondness for wearing a camouflage-patterned singled because it allows him to…
CM Punk injury
December 6, 2012
WWE Champion CM Punk has been forced to withdraw from an upcoming pay-per-view event due to a knee injury, which…
ambrose rollins reigns
December 4, 2012
A costume shop in Stamford, CT has filed a report with local police after three SWAT team uniforms went missing…
Vince WWE
December 3, 2012
When asked about the widely disliked Anonymous General Manager of Raw, WWE boss Vince McMahon recently denied that any such…
police wrestling
November 28, 2012
According to many fans in the live audience at a recent WWE Raw event, the six police officers who dashed…
Survivor series results
November 19, 2012
Scientists worldwide are struggling to explain how the Survivor Series pay-per-view, like the hundreds of similar professional wrestling events that…
November 16, 2012
Eleven-year-old Zachary Peters, a self-described “die-hard WWE fan,” had to ask his father what the second W in the acronym…
montreal screwjob
November 14, 2012
Legendary professional wrestler Bret Hart, who was controversially ousted from WWE in 1997 by a “screwjob” in Montreal, prefers to…
Iran Nuclear
November 13, 2012
United Nations weapons inspectors are demanding access to factories in Iran where they believe scientists are developing atomic elbows. “We…
Shockmaster WCW
November 12, 2012
According to backstage rumors, World Wrestling Entertainment’s creative team is preparing for the debut of a stormtrooper-inspired Diva to be…
original-survivor-series
November 9, 2012
A new study reveals that a disturbingly low proportion of participants in WWE’s Survivor Series pay-per-view have survived long enough…
Van Dam marijuana
November 7, 2012
Mere moments after hearing the news that the State of Colorado has legalized the recreational use of marijuana, professional wrestler…
Jack Tunney
November 6, 2012
The battle for the Oval Office took a shocking turn Tuesday when, against all predictions, the populace voted by a…