Ethan Carter III, better known to fans of the NXT brand of sports-entertainment as EC3, vowed today that he will skyrocket to the main roster of World Wrestling Entertainment with the help of his new manager, Aunt Dixie.
“My aunt is the most brilliant mind that the world of professional sports-entertaining has ever seen,” said EC3 during an impromptu press conference outside his aunt’s Nashville-area bungalow.
“She revolutionized our sport once, and now she’s going to revolutionize her nephew’s path to the WWE Universal Championship.”
Expert sports-entertainmentologists believe the mysterious “Aunt Dixie” is likely Dixie Carter, former star of TV’s Designing Women and former owner of TNA (“Tits and Ass”) Wrestling.
Under Carter’s leadership, TNA entered into a cutthroat “Thursday Night War” with infomercials for the RonCo© Electric Food Dehydrator, nearly putting RonCo© out of business.
If the so-called Aunt Dixie is indeed famed wrestling impresario Dixie Carter, the WWE Universal Championship — and, indeed, the fate of WWE itself — could change forever.