Professional wrestler Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is enjoying a burst in popularity among a large but previously untapped demographic: unfortunate people addicted to crack cocaine.
While The Rock’s popularity has been dwindling among intelligent, socially adept individuals for months now, the opposite trend has occurred among “crackheads” over the past few days.
“He mentioned us on the TV!” said a toothless, wild-eyed crack addict known only as Jinkers, referring to a story The Rock told Monday about buying his first car.
At least 75 crack-addled individuals have come forward to Nashville police this week, each claiming he was the one who sold The Rock a car roughly 20 years ago.
It is believed that people under the influence of crack cocaine are 80 percent more likely to laugh at juvenile phrases like “Twinkie Tits” and “Cookiepuss.”
Crackheads also appreciate the irony that their drug of choice typically comes in a form known as a crack “rock.”