wrestling heel
Although he can’t remember what city he’s in, Damien Sandow is quite certain that he dislikes it.

Unpopular professional wrestler Damien Sandow isn’t afraid to insult the people, culture and/or sports team of the town he’s in, even though he can’t recall exactly where he is.

“This place is a festering cesspool,” Sandow said, feeling pretty sure he was either in Duluth or Minneapolis, but wondering if he might in fact still be Rochester.

“I can’t believe I’m forced to endure this hellhole, surrounded by you Midwestern ignoramuses and your  swine-faced women.”

Sandow seemed to revel in the boos and jeers that then filled the arena, which happened to actually be in Bismarck, ND.

“Boo all you want, philistines,” he continued, looking around the arena for some kind of signage indicating its geographic location.

“I shall leave this swamp tonight, while you miserable people are stuck in this particular godforsaken municipality forever.”

So far in his career, the Sandow has managed to hate 126 towns in eight countries around the world, although he has not spent enough time in any of them to really make a fair assessment.

In related news, Mick Foley has loved every dump and cultural backwater he has visited, and always makes a point of saying the name of his location whenever he’s holding a microphone.