eminem cena
John Cena (left) is considered by many, Eminem included, to be the greatest hip hop recording artist of all time.

Despite his status as the best-selling American recording artist of the last two decades, Marshall “Eminem” Mathers confessed in a new song that he will always feel inferior to his own rap idol, John Cena.

In the new song, titled “I Can’t C U,” Eminem expresses the self-loathing and perpetual disappointment he feels when struggling to match Cena’s lyrical and rhythmic prowess:

You say “never give up”

but how can I live up

to the standard you set? The fans that you get? 

The man with the championships, and all the respect?

You got a Bella, and you rap really well-a, 

And I’m second best, it’s my personal hell-a

To be judged against you, knowing you will excel-a

I’m a lyrical jobber, a rapping jabroni

Compared to John Cena, I’m Louie Spiccoli,

Vomit on my sweater, it’s mom’s rigatoni, 

The wrestler is real, Slim Shady phoney, 

Dear God I just wish that John was my homie. 

The song goes on in great detail about Eminem’s jealousy of Cena’s rapping ability led to depression and substance abuse that left him hospitalized, and how disappointed Eminem was when he learned he was too old to qualify for a Make-A-Wish visit from Cena.

In perhaps the most poignant and heartbreaking lyric of the song, Eminem hollers:

I’m cleanin’ out my closet,

but this time it ain’t about mom;

I’m throwin’ out all my jorts,

’cause they remind me of John.



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