The world of professional sports-entertaining is abuzz today with the news that World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) has officially recruited second-generation sensation Hand “The Slapper” Henry Young.

Hand comes from a lineage of sports entertainment legends, and is said to have inherited the brute strength of his father, Mark Henry, and the rugged manliness of his mother, Mae Young.

Sources at the WWE Performance Center in Orlando, where new recruits hone their ring skills before debuting, say Hand is progressing at a tremendous rate, despite his inability to apply a Figure-Four Leglock or related holds.

“He’s not exactly a high-flyer,” said trainer Matt Bloom, “but from a technical standpoint, he’s a good hand.”

Hand is said to be a master of the eye gouge, the back-rake, and the knife-edge chop, and there is already much buzz about his finisher — inspired by Baron Von Raschke — the Claw.

One anonymous source said Hand is destined for a quick rise to the main roster, where he is expected to team with Al Snow and The Blue Meanie in a faction called The Hand Job Squad.

Leave a Comment