Former professional wrestler Sting is reportedly struggling with his adjustment to retired life, and spends most of his days sitting around the house wearing face paint and hoping the phone will ring.

Following his retirement after a Darby Allin Stunt Show, Sting has tried new hobbies — he has taken up pickleball and fly fishing — but he struggles to make new friends because strangers seem intimidated by his facepaint, singlet and bifocals.

Sting can sometimes be seen in his backyard bouncing on a trampoline, small dumbells in each hand and sweaty paint streaming down face, to stay in shape in case there’s another wrestling booking just around the corner.

Neighbors report that Sting sometimes stands on his front porch, face-painted and bathrobed, leans back and hollers “OWW!” into the air, apparently hoping for other to do the same in response, but typically only waking a few yappy dogs.

Sting recently posted is availability for indy bookings on his Myspace page.


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