The so-called “Divas Revolution” has utterly transformed the women’s division of World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) by introducing the unprecedented concept of attractive women in skimpy clothes calling each other names and fighting.

“Welcome to the new era of the Divas Division,” proclaimed WWE executive Stephanie McMahon moments before announcing a match pitting milky-skinned vixen Paige against prissy minx Nikki Bella, during which much hair was pulled.

Among the innovations that have completely revolutionized women’s professional wrestling:

• Divas now deliver backstage interviews in which they hurl petty insults and attack one another
• Divas now tend to have buxom chests and tiny waistlines, all displayed with revealing, tight-fitting spandex
• Divas factions now have clever acronyms, like Team B.A.D. and PCB
• Feuds are tied-in to “reality TV” program Total Divas, on which the women go shopping, squabble, and cry.

The Divas Revolution is being widely lauded as the greatest triumph for feminism since Baywatch.