Roman reigns surgery
Roman Reigns may have suffered a hernia due to an ill-timed push.

Professional wrestler Roman Reigns has been sidelined with a hernia — an injury that has baffled doctors, given that Reigns has been carried for the majority of his career.

Hernias typically afflict people who attempt to carry more than they should, which would suggest that former Shield teammates Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose should have been the ones to suffer hernias.

The injury has forced Reigns to withdraw from competing tonight at WWE’s Night of Champions pay-per-view, even though opponent Rollins was expected to carry him through their match.

A hernia occurs when an internal organ bursts unexpectedly and painfully out of the bodily cavity that contains, akin to how Reigns burst unexpectedly and painfully out of his role as The Shield’s mute thug into a main-event position.

Hernias can also be caused when a person is suddenly pushed, which seems to be the case with Reigns.

[Editor’s Note: We acknowledge this story is totally dickish, and we actually wish Reigns a speedy recovery]