Legendary rock bassist and professional wrestler Hulk Hogan is “going Hollywood” again, this time to promote a reboot of his defunct action TV show Thunder in Paradise, which he insists will be “bigger than the Beatles, Jesus, and the nWo combined, brother.”
At a press conference this morning outside his Florida beach store, Hogan told a gaggle of onlookers that he has personally scripted nine episodes of Thunder in Paradise: Thunderier, and describes it as “Mission Impossible meets John Wick meets Star Wars, but a billion times better.”
The reboot of Thunder in Paradise, Hogan says, will pick up where the first incarnation left off when it was cancelled after one season. Hogan’s character, former Navy SEAL Randolph J. “Hurricane” Spencer, will flirt with sexy bar owner Kelly LaRue, then he will chase bad guys in a boat and stuff will blow up.
“It is literally the best TV show ever created,” said Hogan, though he has not yet found any interested buyers for his script, which is written in crayon on the back of a weightlifting belt. “It’s going to make Breaking Bad look like garbage, brother.”
Hogan is known to be prone to hyperbole and truth-bending, including these previous claims:
- Hogan says he has played bass for the Rolling Stones, Kyuss, and Ella Fitzgerald
- Hogan claims he press-slammed Andre the Giant “back when he was nine feet tall and weight 17 tons.”
- Hogan insists he leapt off a steel cage onto Jimmy Snuka in Madison Square Garden
Although Hogan’s brother was not present at the press conference, Hogan repeatedly asked permission to tell him something.