After a series of cryptic promos depicting a shadowy figure and the hashtag #August1Warning, TNA Wrestling is planning to unveil — and promptly release — a new wrestler tonight.
In the short vignettes, which supposedly arrived unsolicited at TNA headquarters last week, a silhouetted figure delivers ominous missives in a digitally altered voice.
“I do not work for Impact, I do not work for Spike TV,” snarls the strange figure. “And after tonight, I will not work for anyone, because TNA can’t afford any new hires at the moment.”
The emergence of the bizarre videos has prompted much discussion among wrestling fans, who have speculated that the man could be Goldberg, Bobby Lashley, Bob Holly or Batista.
Based on TNA’s long history of promoting “big announcements” with underwhelming results, however, it is more likely that the newcomer is Gangrel, Duke Droese or D-Lo Brown.
According to backstage sources, the plan is to unveil the newcomer during the third segment of tonight’s Impact Wrestling, then release him during the fifth.
A leaked memo from TNA headquarters reveals that “TNA wishes the mystery man, whoever he is, all the best in his future endeavors.”