HHH waterProfessional wrestler and WWE corporate bigwig Hunter Hearst Helmsley achieved a milestone yesterday when he drank an entire bottle of water without spewing it all over himself.

For years, Helmsley has suffered from a rare physiological disorder called Esophageal Aqua-Evacuation Reflux, which forces him to involuntarily spray water into the air when he tries to drink it.

“It has been a very difficult struggle for him,” said his wife, Stephanie Helmsley-McMahon. “He tries to drink water before a match to avoid dehydration, but invariably sprays it all over himself in front of the fans, which is terribly embarrassing.”

Yesterday, after an extensive bout of physiotherapy and counselling, Helmsley consumed an entire bottle of Evian water without a single mishap.

Following this milestone, Helmsley says he will continue his self-improvement by learning to speak an entire sentence without using the phrase “this business.”

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