Sports-entertainment impresario Vince McMahon issued a rare public apology for being “inadvertently unclear” about the focus of his rebooted XFL, which will not be devoted to football, as many had assumed, but rather foosball.
“Quite frankly, I would never attempt to start a pro football league again, quite frankly,” said McMahon in a pre-recorded message from the rec-room of his Connecticut mansion, surrounded by foosball tables.
“We are going to take foosball [dramatic pause] to the extreme!”
Foosball — also known as “table soccer” or “mini football” or “spinning men impaled on skewers” — has long been a popular family pastime among the McMahon clan; Jess McMahon (Vince’s grandfather) played foosball in the Olympics, and Shane McMahon went to Harvard on a full-ride foosball scholarship.
McMahon’s ill-fated foray into football with the XFL, on the other hand, was a disaster of tragicomic proportions that no sane businessman would ever dare to repeat.