After months of increasingly strange behavior — escalating in a terrifying crab-like crawl — professional wrestler Bray Wyatt has successfully undergone an exorcism.
Wyatt’s family members alerted the Catholic church after he repeatedly uttered cryptic mantras such as “follow the buzzards” and “we’re here,” indicating that demonic entities had taken residence in his soul.
This past Sunday, the severity of the possession escalated dramatically when the demons inside Wyatt propelled him across a wrestling ring in an inverted crab-like gait during WWE’s Battleground pay-per-view.
A world-weary Catholic priest, Father Damien Karras, was called to the Wyatt family homestead Sunday to perform the ancient rite of exorcism.
Karras sprinkled holy water on Wyatt while repeating the sacred incantation: “The power of Vince compels you!”
After a multi-hour ordeal full of profanity and vomit, an exhausted Wyatt appeared to be free of his demons. When asked his name, he correctly replied with his true given name, “Husky.”