WWE fastlane cancelled
Fans will have to wait until next week to see FastLane, though most don’t see the point.

World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) announced this afternoon that its inaugural FastLane pay-per-view, originally scheduled to be held tonight, has been postponed until next Sunday because of a scheduling conflict with the Academy Awards.

“We apologize for any inconvenience,” reads a statement posted on the company’s twitter account. “We totally forgot the Oscars are tonight. Our bad. #Brainfart”

Sources within WWE reveal that the postponement was ordered by company chairman Vince McMahon, who hosts a lavish “Oscar party” every year at his Connecticut mansion.

McMahon is a reportedly a “huge Oscar nerd,” according to one anonymous source, and spent all morning making movie-themed appetizers before realizing that he had accidentally booked FastLane on Oscar night.

The postponement comes as a relief for WWE star The Miz, because now he is able to attend the Academy Awards and, presumably, win the Best Actor award for his stunning portrayal of handicapped astrophysicist Stephen Hawking inĀ The Theory of Everything.

Though some wrestling fans have voiced discontent over the postponement, most merely shrugged and acknowledged that it was a needless, throwaway pay-per-view anyway.