wrestling chops
Moments after this picture was taken, Titus O’Neil discovered that chops to the chest can actually be blocked.

In what is being called a revolutionary leap forward in professional wrestling defensive techniques, WWE Superstar Titus O’Neil discovered today that it is possible to block or otherwise evade repeated chops to the chest.

Employing a technique often used by boxers and MMA fighters, but never previously used by pro wrestlers, O’Neil brought his arms close to his chest, thus blocking a chop attempt by opponent The Big Show.

“I had already been chopped a couple of times, which really stings,” recalls O’Neil. “So I thought to myself: how can I avoid getting chopped again?”

O’Neil said a “light bulb went off” in his head, as it dawned on him that he could protect the sensitive flesh of his pectoral region by using the protective shield of his forearms, rather than just keeping his arms draped uselessly over the top rope. He was able to anticipate the next chop because the Big Show insisted on theatrically shushing the live audience first.

News of O’Neil’s innovation spread like wildfire through pro wrestling locker rooms worldwide — even to Japan, where entire matches are predicated on unblocked choppage to the chest.

Wrestling experts now believe that, if the chop-blocking strategy had been discovered sooner, Ric Flair would never have won a wrestling championship.