WrestleMania musical guest
Vince McMahon is already in rehearsals for the WrestleMania halftime show.

World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) confirmed today that company chairman Vince McMahon will headline the halftime show of this year’s WrestleMania with a grandiose rendition of his 1987 hit Stand Back.

McMahon is reportedly in rehearsals for the March 29 event, which will feature McMahon riding on the back of a giant animatronic lion, belting out ode to ballsy self-aggrandizement.

The song, which skyrocketed to the top of the Billboard music charts after its release on Piledriver: The Wrestling Album 2, is ostensibly a tribute to the late Andre the Giant, though everyone knows it’s actually McMahon’s tribute to his own indomitable ego.

WWE has also confirmed that the WrestleMania halftime performance will feature McMahon’s original band: Hulk Hogan (bass), the Killer Bees and Junkyard Dog (saxophone), George Steele (tambourine), and Randy Savage, Jake Roberts and Brutus Beefcake (trumpet).

Some fans have expressed concern that Junkyard Dog and Randy Savage might not be capable of performing, on account of no longer being alive. Everyone agrees, however, that they’ll still sound far better than McMahon’s singing.