Kayfabe News has refrained from satirical reporting about about the tragic passing of legendary wrestler The Ultimate Warrior, in acknowledgement that such reportage — even if merely intended to provide some levity amid very sad times — would be much “too soon.”
The website has determined that it is much too soon to blame the iconic wrestler’s death on a voodoo curse cast by Papa Shango.
Likewise, Kayfabe News has decided that it is way too soon to post an article with the following headline: “Penultimate Warrior No Longer Second-Best.”
Although laughter is the most powerful weapon against tragedy, the website acknowledges that quipping about the Ultimate Warrior’s return to Parts Unknown would also come too soon.
In fact, Kayfabe News acknowledges that this very article, which points out that Ultimate Warrior jokes are all too soon, is itself too soon.
To be serious for a moment: Rest in peace, Warrior. You will be missed.