Trump demands deportation of illegal foreign objects
Celebrity real-estate mogul and presidential candidate Donald Trump has sparked controversy once again by insisting that illegal foreign objects — typically used by wrestling heels to unfairly assault opponents — should be deported.
“These foreign objects are shiftless, sneaking into this country in the trunks and boots of wrestlers,” Trump said during a press conference this morning.
“What’s more, they take jobs from perfectly good domestic objects, like a roll of nickels or American-made brass knuckles.”
Trump, who is a WWE Hall of Fame inductee for reasons still unknown, said wrestling referees need to be more vigilant to spot and eject illegal foreign objects.
“Referees almost never do the pre-match pat-down anymore,” Trump said. “Deport the refs too.”
Trump promised that, if elected President, he would “build a wall around the trunks and boots of all heel wrestlers to prevent foreign objects from tainting the pure, beautiful sport of pro wrestling.”