Gene Snitsky
Gene Snitsky has finally admitted culpability.

Professional wrestler Gene Snitsky has, after nearly a decade of protestations to the contrary, admitted this morning that he is indeed at fault.

“It is, upon deeper reflection, my fault,” a shame-faced Snitsky told reporters gathered at a press conference in Tampa.

Added Snitsky: “My bad.”

The 300-pound, acne-pocked goliath has spent most of the past decade vehemently denying any culpability in unfortunate events — particularly in the tragic miscarriage of Lita’s unborn child (the bastard rape-child of Kane).

Snitsky said today that, after years of psychiatric counselling, he has come to grips with his responsibility in a number of nefarious other happenings, such as the punting of a lifelike doll into a crowd of wrestling fans.

Snitsky adamantly denied, however, any responsibility in the mysterious 2007 bombing of Vince McMahon’s limousine.

“That was the fault of bad writing,” he said.