shawn michaels 2020
Shawn Michaels “isn’t looking so great these days,” says Todd Benson (inset), who is three pizzas away from a coronary.

Legendary professional wrestler Shawn Michaels has “really let himself go,” according to a longtime fan who has really, really let himself go.

“Look how bald HBK is now,” said Todd Benson, a 47-year-old stay-at-home son who began losing his own hair at 21, but wears a bullet club cap to cover his thinning wisps.

Benson, a former sandwich artist currently making a living selling WWF action figures on eBay, says Michaels should “stop embarrassing himself” with returns to WWE programming. 

Benson is known among his 32 Twitter followers as a guy who “tells it like it is,” like the time he heaved his hippopotamic girth off the sofa to tweet that Bayley is “maybe getting a bit chubby lately.”

A self-proclaimed “smart mark,” Benson claims that WWE honcho Vince McMahon is “out of touch,” and regularly insists that the Attiude Era should make a comeback to “save the business.”

Benson says he understands “the industry” because his cousin is Facebook friends with B. Brian Blair.


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