Retired professional wrestler and avid outdoorsman Shawn Michaels finally found his lost smile yesterday, then promptly killed it with a crossbow.
Michaels, who lost his smile in 1997, has been searching in vain for the elusive facial feature ever since.
Having retired from professional wrestling several years ago, Michaels has armed himself with a variety of deadly firearms and devoted himself to smile-hunting.
His quest to stalk and kill the missing smile has been the focus of his reality TV show, MacMillan River Adventures.
Yesterday, while on a hunting expedition in rural Oklahoma, the camouflage-clad and wooly-bearded Michaels spotted his smile rummaging through some underbrush.
When the long-lost smile stepped into a clearing to drink from a small pond, Michaels aimed his crossbow and fired upon the smile, which writhed in agony for several minutes before bleeding out.
Michaels intends to stuff and mount the smile above his fireplace, right next to the framed centerfold from the Playgirl magazine in which he posed nude.