Fandango a's breathe
Dr. Richard Boscoe with his new book about letting the a’s breathe.

Dr. Richard Bescoe, a respected speech pathologist, has released a comprehensive 720-page manual explaining how, when saying Fandango’s name, to properly let the a’s breathe.

Titled Say It Right or He Won’t Wrestle, the book is Dr. Bescoe’s response to the sudden worldwide demand for speech therapy following the debut of World Wrestling Entertainment performer Fandango.

“Speech pathologists and therapists worldwide have been bombarded with requests for counselling, since so few people know how to let their a’s breathe,” said Dr. Bescoe.

“Many people — such as WWE ring announcer Justin Roberts, for example — require detailed, step-by-step instructions to overcome their speech impediments.”

Dr. Bescoe hopes to capitalize on a viral phenomenon known as the Fandango Revolution, in which countless wrestling fans worldwide have downloaded a song they’ll intensely dislike after a few weeks.