World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) presents its annual Tables Ladders & Chairs pay-per-view tonight, and we assembled a panel of experts to make predictions for the Universal Championship match, which we mistakenly believed would be happening.

“With Brock Lesnar continuing to tease a return to UFC, we might see him drop the title tonight as a way to make time for MMA training,” is what we were planning to say until we realized Lesnar will not be defending his championship at TLC.

Given that TLC has become one of the longest-running pay-per-views outside of the Big Four (WrestleMania, SummerSlam, Survivor Series, Crown Jewel in [REDACTED]), it seemed reasonable to assume that WWE’s most prestigious championship (besides the Mixed Match Challenge Trophy, of course) would be defended at the event.

But Lesnar is reportedly spending the evening with his feminist book club, and is not scheduled to compete in a WWE ring until WrestleMania 37 in Pyongyang.

So we will instead present our prediction for the actual main event: 87 percent of fans will be asleep by then, and you can take that one to the bank.