After decades in the shadow of his more famous and talented cousin, the Penultimate Warrior has finally shed his status as second-best.
It’s a bittersweet occasion for the Penultimate Warrior, however, since he had hoped to claim the title of Ultimate by winning a spectacular wrestling match, not by default after the heartbreaking, untimely passing of his cousin.
“I have always wanted to be Ultimate,” he confessed, “but not like this. I would gladly remain Penultimate if it meant my cousin were still here.”
The Penultimate Warrior never achieved the fame or fortune of his cousin, due to his comparatively doughy physique, haphazardly applied facepaint and coherent promos.
Although he was jealous of the Ultimate Warrior’s success, he also acknowledged that his cousin was a one-of-a-kind performer whose influence and appeal will endure for generations.
The Penultimate Warrior, even though he could now rightfully claim the monicker “Ultimate,” has decided against using the name out of respect for his cousin’s remarkable legacy.
Instead, he intends to change is name to The Not-Too-Shabby Warrior.