kane slacks
Kane wears sensible slacks to the ring, having once again forgotten his wrestling attire at home.

According to sources within World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE), many┬ápersonnel within the company are beginning to worry about Kane’s mental wellbeing after the longtime superstar and current executive forgot his ring gear at home for the 67th week in a row.

“I’m starting to wonder if he has suffered too many chairshots to the head or something,” said one colleague who, for the sake of anonymity, asked to be identified only as Z. Ryder.

“I mean, we’ve all forgotten our gear once or twice, but Kane never remembers to bring it anymore.”

This past Monday on WWE’s flagship weekly program, Raw, Kane once again competed in a match wearing sensible business trousers and a pair of shiny wingtip shoes — a far cry from the fiery red spandex tights he typically wore before senility robbed him of his memory.

WWE Chairman Vince McMahon reportedly told Kane he should tie a string around his pinky finger as a reminder to pack his boots and tights next time he is preparing for a road trip, but Kane forgot to buy the string.

Kane’s failing memory is also believed to be responsible for the fact that, from week to week, he can’t figure out whether he should be a babyface or a heel, and often flip-flops between the roles several times in a given night.