Lesnar return
The Universal Champion fans want, but don’t deserve.

After what has been deemed by many pundits as a “failed experiment” with Seth Rollins as WWE Universal Champion, it seems the writing is on the proverbial wall: it is time for Brock Lesnar to finally reclaim what is rightfully his.

“WWE is losing the New Monday Night War to YouTube videos of cats falling off ledges,” writes veteran sports-entertainment journalist Dan Mutzler.

“It has been far too long since Brock Lesnar held the Universal Championship, and it is time for him to reign again.”

Ratings have plummeted since Lesnar’s post-WrestleMania departure, and many experts have said the Universal Championship has “lost all meaning” since it started getting regularly defended on WWE programming.

Seth Rollins has “over-exposed” the championship, writes Mutzler, by “defending it ad nauseam at televised events and house shows.”

What WWE fans actually want, Mutzler writes, is a “sociopathic albino gorilla who shrieks like a pterodactyl to defend the championship on a quarterly basis.”

Lesnar is expected to reclaim the championship at the upcoming TLC Tables Ladders and Chairs event, and then defend it against Dominic Mysterio at WrestleMania 44.

Support Independent Satire: Get a shirt!


Leave a Comment