Sports-entertainment commentators were shocked, for some reason, when the action of a recent match became too big to contain even within the walls of Hell in a Cell and the action spilled out of its inescapable confines. 

“I can’t believe what I’m seeing,” hollered commentator Michael Cole, despite having seen exactly this same thing happen in the previous 26 Hell in a Cell matches. 

The roofed steel cage known as Hell in a Cell has been billed as “inescapable and impenetrable” since its WWE debut at 1997 Badd Bloddd, during which it was both escaped by Shawn Michaels and penetrated by Thatsgotta Beekane (later shortened to just Kane). 

Famous escapers of the inescapable cage include Michard “Mick” Foley, Rikishi, Shawn Michaels, and every other sports-entertainer who has ever been “locked inside” the structure, which is “inescapable” in the sense that the Titanic was unsinkable. 

According to our calculations, in fact, the Hell in a Cell cage is escaped more frequently than a typical non-roofed steel cage, and even more frequently than a standard ring with no cage at all. 

Evidently, fans enjoy seeing their favourite superstars escape from things, which is the inspiration behind WWE’s newest addition to its pay-per-view line up, Hell in a Giant Wet Paper Bag.