Sports-entertainer Robert “Bobby” Lashley may look like he spends countless hours pumping iron in a gym, but WWE superstar admitted today that his sculpted physique was literally sculpted by some of the best cosmetic surgeons in Malibu. 

During a candid one-on-one interview with Oprah Winfrey, Lashley revealed that his enormous delts, his swole glutes, and even his elephantine quads are “just silicone implants, botox injections, and a lot of liposuction.”

“I honestly haven’t even set foot inside a gym in, like, 20 years,” admitted Lashley. “Lifting weights has never appealed to me. But I still wanted to look all big and muscley, you know, so I took the easy route, and look at me now! I’m surprised more people don’t take the easy route. It’s much easier.” 

Medical records obtained by Kayfabe News confirm that, over the past seven years, cosmetic surgeons have performed numerous procedures on Lashley including: 

• Full deltoid resculpting
• Six bi-annual double-pectoral implant swap
• Glute pumping
• Neck reduction
• 3D-printed biceps embiggenation 
• Abdominal twelvepackination procedure 
• Complimentary eyebrow pencilling 

Many fans were surprised to learn that Lashley is not actually as athletic as he looks, given his seemingly superhuman power, speed, and stamina in the ring. 

Lashley explains: “Hey, what can I say? When you look good, you feel good! Ever since I got these cosmetic surgeries, my confidence is sky-high!” 

JUST GET A SHIRT ALREADY. PLEASE?!?!?