Bobby Heenan hogan
Bobby “The Brain” Heenan has achieved his lifelong mission of killing Hulkamania.

Legendary professional wrestling manager Bobby “The Brain” Heenan has been emotionally torn in recent weeks after his lifelong mission — the death of Hulkamania — finally came to fruition.

On one hand, Heenan feels vindicated that his tireless work campaigning against Hulkamania has achieved its desired result, as millions of recovering Hulkamaniacs have abandoned their former hero.

On the other hand, such success is bittersweet because it has created a void of purpose in Heenan’s life, leaving him feeling adrift and rudderless.

Although Heenan believes the death of Hulkamania can be attributed entirely to his vociferous criticism of the phenomenon, most former Hulkamaniacs (or “Humanoids,” as Heenan calls them) attribute their change in attitude to Hulk Hogan’s chronic dickishness.

While health problems have kept Heenan out of the spotlight in recent years, his zeal for entertaining remains as strong as ever: he performs in a weasel costume during children’s birthday parties at his local Chuck E. Cheese’s.