Fans of professional sports-entertaining were thrilled Sunday night when long-retired WWE Superstar Edge (real name Sexton Hardcastle) made a triumphant return, but for fans without the benefit of flash photography, Edge’s reunion with brother Christian (real name Christian Hardcastle) will have to remain just a fleeting memory.
When the Royal Rumble went off the air, the Hardcastle siblings delighted fans with one of their trademark “Five-Second Poses,” which they used to conduct on a regular basis for fans who enjoyed the first-world luxury of flash photography.
But for fans who foolishly bought phones and cameras without flashes — presumably from the trunk of a car or in a back alley of Kuala Lumpur — the five seconds pose made for dark, blurry, and in some cases utterly unviewable photographs.
“I thought flash photography was just a passing fad,” said one fan, longtime Dallas-area wrestling fan sandwich artist Jeremy Gill. “Had I known Edge and Christian would reunite, I would have sprung for one of them fancy flashy cameras.”
Rumors are already swirling over a possible reunion of The Brood, although in today’s more sensitive, PG-rated WWE, they will no longer be allowed to use buckets of real human blood, instead using run-of-the-mill whale blood.