At a recent World Wrestling Entertainment event in Arkansas, it was discovered that 100 percent of the fans in attendance looked like they could belong to the notorious Wyatt Family.
All 12,938 fans in attendance at the WWE “house show” — including all 48 women — seemed perfectly suited for membership in the ominous cadre of inbred rednecks led by the darkly charismatic Bray Wyatt.
Every male fan, and some of the women, possessed long, scraggly beards, which dangled over unwashed shirts. Every fan emitted the pungent aroma of overripe underarms, bathtub moonshine and vague evil.
Several of the fans brought their own rocking chairs to the event, which mysteriously continued to rock even while the fans were standing.
Some of the fans concealed their faces with unsettling sheep masks, while others wandered about the darkened arena carrying oil lamps.
It is believed that the total number of teeth in the arena was slightly lower than the collective I.Q.