demoltion vs new day
Demolition (right) insist they are still “walking disaster,” as claimed by rocker Rick Derringer.

The longest-reigning WWE Tag Team Champions of all time, Demolition, have announced their return to sports entertainment to prevent a record-breaking reign by hooting unicorns The New Day.

Ax Jefferson and Smash Finkelstein, who have not been seen in WWE since 1990, decided to reform their iconic team after agreeing that New Day had become “just too annoying.”

Although both members of Demolition are now slightly older — Smash is 61, Ax is 103 — they insist they can still perform the Demolition Decapitation, a backbreaker-elbowdrop combination that was literally the greatest thing in the entire world if you were a young boy in 1987.

Sadly, Demolition will no longer be managed by Mr. Fuji, who passed away last month, but Luscious Johnny V has agreed to perform managerial duties and carry goalie masks.

Most wrestling pundits believe Demolition will have a long title reign — unless, of course, the long-awaited Strike Force reunion happens.