Elias samson
Elias Samson is an inspiration to hearing-impaired singers everywhere.

In one of the most heartwarming moments in the history of professional wrestling, Elias Samson — a tone-deaf man biologically incapable of holding a tune — bravely performed an original song in front of 15,000 fans at Monday Night Raw. 

Samson, who was born with a genetic defect rendering him incapable of hearing or producing melody, overcame his fears by sitting alone on a stool, bathed in a single spotlight, and performing one of his original, off-key songs. 

“The drifter has drifted in to WWE,” Samson warbled, his sense of pitch utterly nonexistent. “And my voice is drifting from key to keyyyyy.”

Samson was unable to complete his song due to a rude interruption by Dean Ambrose, who clearly didn’t appreciate the inspirational courage it took for Samson to perform despite his profound tonal disability. 

If history is any indication, Samson’s future in WWE could be very bright, given that numerous sufferers of tone-deafness — Jeff Jarrett, The Rock, and Kurt “Jimmy Crack Corn” Angle — have attained championship gold.