Eleven-year-old Jimmy Blackmore, despite being confined to a wheelchair due to a rare neurological disorder, is hoping to somehow re-injure John Cena during a Make-A-Wish visit with the professional wrestler tonight.

Jimmy, like many of Cena’s detractors, dislikes the wrestler for his squeaky-clean image, his jokey attitude toward any situation, his ability to kick out of practically any maneuver after a two-count, and his ugly shirts.

“I’m not sure how I’m going to injure him,” said Jimmy, “but it must be done.”

Although Jimmy could have chosen to meet with his favorite wrestler, CM Punk, he selflessly opted to meet with Cena — and sabotage the wrestler’s scheduled return to the ring after a months-long absense — in order to injure him “for the greater good.”

Jimmy is scheduled to meet Cena backstage tonight at Miami’s American Airlines Arena, the site of WWE’s Hell in a Cell event, where Jimmy hopes to rig up some kind of elaborate trap.

“I don’t want to paralyze him or anything,” said Jimmy. “I just want to make sure he’s out of commission until after WrestleMania.”

Leave a Comment