Professional wrestler Brock Lesnar was reportedly “giddy” to find out this week that he is still the reigning and defending (well, reigning) WWE Universal Champion. 

“Haha, wow,” chuckled Lesnar after being told by one of his neighbours in rural Saskatchewan that he holds one of the most coveted prizes in World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE). “I had totally forgotten about that!”

Lesnar at first reacted with disbelief upon hearing the news, assuming that he had been stripped of the title for not defending it within 30 days, as per a traditional rule of sports-entertainment. 

“I thought they just gave it to Vacant or something,” Lesnar said. “He deserves it.”

Lesnar, who has not appeared on WWE programming since winning the championship at WrestleMania in early April, was also surprised to learn that he will eventually defend his title against the winner of a fatal five-way match. 

Upon hearing that Finn Balor is the odds-on favourite to become number-one contender, Lesnar replied: “Who?”