In a time-honored tradition in as old as the Constitution, newly elected US President Joe Biden has officially confirmed victory by shaving the head of the deposed Donald Jennifer  Trump. 

Biden used a set of electric clippers — the same ones he uses for his daily ear hair trim — to shave the head of one-term jabroni.

Incredibly, it turns out that Trump had only one very long strand of hair, wrapped like wispy cotton candy in countless loops around his skull.

Trump, defiant to the end, kicked and screamed during the haircut, but was held to the chair by Brutus Beefcake, Steve Austin, and the collective will of a democratic citizenry.

 

 

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