The World Coronavirus Wreport (WCW) came out with its strongest guidelines yet, “strongly encouraging” Asian pro wrestlers to “quit it” with the green-mist spewing once and for all.
The pronouncement states that the spewing of mysterious, blinding green mist should be used “in emergency situations only,” such as at WrestleMania.
The world’s most successful Asian wrestler, Lord Tensai, said he worries that the restriction will just further fuel the recent groundswell of anti-spewing propaganda.
“Hai, so desu ne,” said Lord Tensai. “Watasha wa honto ni nihonjin desu.” (Translation: “Mist-spewing is a time-honoured tradition of my fellow enormous shaved Asian roundeyed feudal Lords.”)
For now, all Asian wrestlers are asked to spew hand sanitizer.