ambrose raw
Dean Ambrose said he will “destroy” Seth Rollins, right after his colonoscopy, vasectomy, and tummy tuck.

Picking up where he left off last week — uttering threats toward Seth Rollins while receiving vaccinations to protect him from the “diseases” of the WWE Universe — professional sports-entertainer Dean Ambrose will deliver a promo on Raw tonight in the midst of a colonoscopy.

Ambrose has promised he will “pull no punches” while a gastroenterologist conducts an¬†endoscopic examination of Ambrose’s large bowel via a camera on flexible tube passed through Ambrose’s anus.

Sources close to Ambrose say he is hell-bent to defeat Rollins at the upcoming Tables Ladders & Chairs pay-per-view, and also hell-bent to discover whether his mildly bloody stool is anything to be worried about.

Some pundits are speculating that Ambrose is now truly earning his nickname as “The Lunatic Fringe,” though others suggest the only mental-health struggle he faces is hypochondria.

Other self-proclaimed experts suggest last week’s vaccine inoculations are causing Ambrose’s aggressive behaviour, despite the the repeated denials from Stone Cold that vaccines are linked to Austinism.