A prominent neurological surgeon announced yesterday that Vince McMahon’s trademark swagger — long presumed to be a sign of arrogance — is actually indicative of a serious disorder.

“The way he swings his arms is worrying,” said Dr. Henry Lee of Harvard Medical School. “It indicates a struggle for balance. His wide, loping gait is also evidence of degenerative nerve damage.”

The most distressing aspect of McMahon’s so-called “strut,” however, is the extreme waggling of his head.

“Mr. McMahon apparently has almost no control over the motion of his head,” said Lee.

“His neck muscles seem to be weaker than those of a newborn child. He needs medical attention immediately, before the weight of his head snaps his spine.”

McMahon could not be reached for comment, and is presumed dead.




 

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