Still overjoyed with the runwaway success of his recent “Tater Tots” wisecrack about Sheamus, professional wrestler Roman Reigns is wracking his brain to concoct potato-based punnery about his latest nemesis, Hunter Hearst Helmsley.

Reigns was initially planning on using “French Fry,” based on Helmsley’s real surname, Levesque, but he worries the quip is “too clever.”

Reigns viciously attacked Helmsley, the Chief Operating Officer of World Wrestling Entertainment, with a steel chair at the company’s TLC event, and has been testing tuber wordplay ideas on friends ever since.

Reigns has shortlisted several of his favorite puns, and intends to use at least one of them — perhaps all of them — this week on Raw:

  • I hit Triple H so many times, he’s like mashed potatoes!
  • Do you hate me, Triple H? Well taters’ gonna tate!
  • Hitting you with a steel chair was very a-peeling!
  • You’re not a COO. You’re a dicktater!
  • I’m going to stick a fork in you — you’re done!

Needless to say, the temporary fan excitement around Reigns will quickly dwindle back to normal levels.

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