World Wrestling Entertainment announced this morning that the heavy, cumbersome Money in the Bank briefcase will be phased out in favor of the much more convenient Money in the Bank USB Stick.
While the winner of a Money in the Bank ladder match enjoys the privilege of a championship match at the time and place of his choosing, past winners have complained about the hassle of lugging a bulky briefcase around the world.
“Getting that damned thing through airport security is the worst,” said past winner Daniel Bryan. “Every security guard demands I open it, and then I have to go through the long explanation of what it’s for.”
WWE officials decided that the standard metal briefcase is excessively large, given that it contains only a single sheet of paper — the contract stipulating the rules for the impromptu title match.
Plus there was the persistent problem of wrestlers continually clobbering one another with the briefcase.
The small USB stick — with two gigabytes of storage space and a handy keyring — was deemed perfectly sufficient to contain a PDF version of the legal document, and much easier to tote from city to city.
Asked whether he was pleased with the change, Bryan responded with an emphatic “Yes!”