Man's entire political worldview shaped by foreign wrestling heels - Kayfabe News twitter google

Man’s entire political worldview shaped by foreign wrestling heels

WWE heels

This man plans to teach his son not to trust Russians, Iranians, or people from Parts Unknown.

Though he claims to be “well versed” in matters of politics, 34-year-old Mike Russell of Atlanta possesses a geopolitical understanding that is based entirely on the dastardly deeds of foreign heel wrestlers.

While discussing politics with friends recently, Russell said he “can’t wait to see Donald Trump shave Obama’s head,” alluding to the time Trump won the right at shave WWE mogul Vince McMahon’s head at WrestleMania 23.

Among Russell’s other erroneous political beliefs:

  • All Iranians wear curly-toed boots
  • The Middle East has been peaceful ever since Muhammad Hassan was captured
  • Bulgaria and Russia are basically the same place
  • All Samoans are related to The Rock
  • Mexico, Ireland, England and Bulgaria are strong international allies who form a “league of nations”
  • All people from Uganda slap their painted bellies

Russell claims to be a history buff and a patriot, and says he strives to emulate the greatest American president, Jack Tunney.

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