Lifelong wrestling fan Reece Theberge’s entire conception of reality was shaken to its core today after Brad, the douchey hipster from HR, told Theberge that professional wrestling is “totally fake and scripted.”
Witnesses of the brief verbal exchange say Theberge, a 33-year-old data entry clerk at a mid-sized Ohio bathroom fixture supply firm, was visibly shaken by Brad’s unwelcome revelation.
Having watched wrestling since he was just a little boy, Theberge was faced with the sudden, harsh, reality-shattering revelation that the sport he loves so dearly may not be entirely on the up-and-up.
Sadly, this experience is all too common among wrestling fans. Whether they’re watching Raw on TV at a bar or proudly wearing their new 17th Bullet Club t-shirt in public for some reason, wrestling fans are always in danger of having their minds blown by smug, passing strangers and acquaintances saying “Ha, look, they’re not even really hitting each other.”
Just last week, tragically, wrestling fan Reece Theberge went into complete catatonic shock after his older cousin told him that wrestling is “a soap opera for men” — an astute observation that, as far as we can tell, has never been uttered aloud by anyone before.