The pink slips continue to fly at World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE), as it was confirmed today that the company has released the gaggle of goofy-looking fans who always sit in the front row opposite the hard camera.
“WWE wishes the Ringside Regulars all the best in their future attempts to be see on national television every week,” reads a press release issued this morning by the company.
The press release specifically names the most notorious of the Ringside Regulars:
- Long-haired Simon (a.k.a. Peter Steele Guy)
- Simon’s mom (?)
- Superfan Smilez (a.k.a. Green Shirt Guy)
- Brock Lesnar Guy
An anonymous backstage source, who asked to be named only as Hunter H., said the Ringside Regulars were under contract to WWE as professional seat-fillers, who were contractually barred from ever leaving their chairs at ringside. Several suffered ruptured bladders.
Rumor has it the Ringside Regulars are headed for AEW, where they are expected to sit behind Tall Hipster D-Bags Who Stand Always Inconsiderately Stand Up for An Unreasonable Duration.
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