Professional wrestling organization AEW has been “really phoning it in lately,” announced wrestling fan Paul Gleimer to the 23 other wrestling fans listening to audience of WrestleGab Live, a phone-in chat show. 

“The workrate of AEW workers has gone downhill,” declared Gleimer, a 35-year-old former sandwich artist who has not been employed since moving back into his parents’ place in 2018.

Gliemer, whose adult-onset diabetes and heavyset frame give him a lumbering waddle, was recently disappointed by the “slow pace” a match between Samoa Joe and Jon Moxley.

“I mean, AEW is just going through the motions now,” complained Gleimer, who gets winded by going through any motions. 

Gleimer was about to begin a rant about how “boring” WWE has become, but the host of WrestleGab live quickly got bored and went to a new caller.