After more than a half-century of sports-entertaining, World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) has ceased operations, its vast fortunes wagered by company honcho Vince McMahon on Powerball lottery tickets.
With their belongings packed into cardboard boxes, WWE employees filed out of the company’s Stamford headquarters — including McMahon’s own daughter, Stephanie, and son-in-law Hunter H. Helmsley.
“The old man finally lost it,” Helsmley was heard muttering as security guards escorted him to his car. “We knew this day would come eventually.”
Unconfirmed reports say the elder McMahon spent every penny of his vast fortune on Powerball tickets, except for the $4.50 he spent on Slim Jims at the same convenience store.
McMahon was later spotted naked on the roof of Titan Towers, shaking his fist at the sky and “daring God” to deny him the $1.5 billion jackpot.