Professional wrestler Damien Sandow proved his superior intellect once again this week by deciding not to bounce off the ring ropes and run straight into his waiting opponent’s clothesline.
When given an Irish whip toward the ropes by opponent Zack Ryder, Sandow merely decided not to bounce off them and dash at full speed in the direction from whence he had come.
“Granted, the ring ropes have some degree of elasticity, but not nearly enough to propel me uncontrollably toward certain danger,” Sandow said in an interview after the match.
“Only an ignoramus would allow himself to be slingshot by the ropes into harm’s way.”
For decades, when Irish-whipped toward the ring ropes, wrestlers have spun 180 degrees and been thrust back by a mysteriously powerful rebound force that has perplexed physicists.
Sandow’s revelation was that it’s quite simple to prevent oneself from being catapulted off the ropes merely by planting one’s feet and refusing to run any further.
His no-bouncing technique has since been adopted by countless wrestlers, to whom Sandow says simply: “You’re welcome.”