In an unprecedented move that sent shockwaves through the tech industry today, social media juggernaut Twitter has banned all professional wrestlers from posting any further “tweets” on the service.
“That’s enough,” said Dick Costolo, CEO of Twitter. “You blew it, guys.”
In a press release issued this morning by Twitter’s corporate headquarters, the company wrote: “Professional wrestlers have, time and again, misused our social networking service to spread hateful, poorly spelled, controversial and ultimately pointless tweets. From today onward, the tweeting privileges of all pro wrestlers are fully revoked.”
Despite being limited to merely 160 characters, tweets by wrestlers have included, on average, 70 percent more numbskullery than tweets by the general populace.
The press release cited some of the most blatant infractions of Twitter’s Code of Conduct committed by pro wrestlers, including:
- Ring of Honor champion Jay Briscoe’s tweets indicating that he would “f*cking shoot” proponents of same-sex marriage
- Ryback’s derogatory statement about John Cena’s ex-wife
- CM Punk’s suggestion that the outgoing Pope was a Nazi
- Hulk Hogan’s mindless retweeting of everything
- Dixie Carter’s incessant suggestions that a “major announcement” will be made on TNA programming each week
- All of Scott Steiner’s tweets
WWE performers wishing to utilize social media will now be limited to video messages on TOUT, which will be harmless because nobody will see them.