A three-man Special Weapons and Tactics (SWAT) team is planning an assault on a dangerous cult of inbred hillbillies during a special operation this Sunday.

Tensions has been mounting for weeks between the redneck cultists and the justice-seeking law enforcement squad, and is expected to boil over in a dangerous showdown in Minneapolis.

The cult has been under surveillance by the SWAT team for some time now, suspected of promoting dangerous quasi-religious viewpoints and general creepiness.

Although the SWAT team is made up of three highly trained operatives, there is some concern that dissent among the ranks might lead to a dangerous loss of focus during the assault.

The de facto leader of the tactical squadron insists that the operation will proceed without a hitch, but his second-in-command (who is bigger, stronger, and seeking more prominence on the squad) merely smirked knowingly.

The entire showdown is, of course, being filmed for a soon-to-air episode of popular reality TV program Cops. 

In totally unrelated news, this weekend’s “Elimination Chamber” professional wrestling pay-per-view will feature a six-man tag team match pitting The Shield against the Wyatt Family.

Leave a Comment